No, weather.com, I do not want to save my goddamn location.
|I also don't need more reasons to hate you.|
Reason #2: They are so goddamn smug that they have upgraded their weather graphics. I feel that 'graphics' is the kind of pretentious terminology the picture below requires.
|SIGNIFICANT AND WIDESPREAD SEVERE DANGEROUS CALAMITIES INVOLVING VOLCANOES, TSUNAMIS, FIRE RAIN, AND STRONG WINDS POSSIBLE|
Reason #3: Stop trying to be sexy by packing your banner ads with as many scary words as possible and misusing sensationalist terms such as "outbreak." H1N1 was an outbreak. SARS was an outbreak. Muffin-tops *shudder* are an outbreak. Higher temperatures and theoretical tornadoes do not qualify.
I know you're struggling to bring excitement back into our relationship, but this is just sad. This weather hype will inevitably make you look foolish. What are you going to do when 'outbreak' stops getting people's attention? How many new ways can you come up with to keep people interested?
You can get as much plastic surgery as you want. I still won't love you.